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Flying with children has never been easy. But now, when lengthy delays and unexpected diversions seem to be the rule rather than the exception, it can be even more difficult for traveling parents, grandparents and kids to keep their cool. In 17 years as a flight attendant – and as the mother of 8-year-old twins – I've seen it all, and I've developed some essential survival strategies guaranteed to keep everyone sane.

PLAN AHEAD

The best way to make your journey as painless as possible is to book a non-stop flight. If you're coming from the West coast, a late-night or red-eye flight to the Caribbean is also a good option; children should sleep through it. Short of that, catching the earliest available flight means you probably won't suffer the domino effect of delays that may occur later in the day. Save time by checking in online and reserving seats before you leave for the airport. Arriving extra early will give you and the kids plenty of time to use the bathroom and get through security, allowing you to board early.

Airplanes can feel like flying iceboxes, so it's important to dress for the journey, not for Jamaica. Putting children in tank tops, shorts and flip-slops is a good way to create human popsicles. Even in summer, layering is key: Choose thin, long pants and long-sleeved shirts, sweaters and hoodies, and bring a young child's favorite blanket. Pack an extra t-shirt in case of spills and socks to keep little feet warm. For infants, bring a thin hat and turn air vents off or away from them.

IN-FLIGHT ESSENTIALS

Once you're on board, you'll need something to occupy the kids. Cash-strapped airlines have cut back on amenities such as pillows and blankets, so bring everything you might need – think of it as an airborne camping trip. Snacks and drinks are available for purchase on some flights, but bring cash: some airlines don't accept plastic. A portable DVD player is always a hit; just make sure you pack headsets to avid disturbing your seatmates, and bring a splitter, which will allow two children to watch The Wiggles simultaneously. Surprising kids with a new movie or cartoon for the trip is a good idea, too. Pack a variety of toys and games but avoid stickers, markers and crayons. Older children will appreciate a new game for their Game Boy or Nintendo handhelds; make sure they turn down the volume.

Portable treats such as string cheese, crackers and fruit bars are healthy snacks, and lollipops and hard candy are handy for children to suck on during the descent to help reduce ear pain as the cabin pressure changes. Since 2006, the Transportation Security Administration has restricted the carriage of liquids and gels on board. Such toiletries must be packed in containers that hold 3 ounces or less (drugstores sell empty bottles) and fit inside a clear one-quart, zip-top bag. Don't forget to bring baby wipes, diapers and plastic bags for disposal. And if your children require medication, never pack it in your checked luggage. After you've cleared security, buy bottled water. Even at $4 a bottle, it'll be worth it if you find yourself stuck on the tarmac for hours. If you have a baby or toddler, you're allowed to take milk, formula, juice and baby food through security. For the latest information, go to tsa.gov and browse the "Traveling with Children" page.

NAVIGATING THE AIRPORT

If you're the only adult traveling with more than one child, bring your double stroller. Airport concourses can go on for what seems like an eternity – hello, Miami! – and the last thing you want is a hectic dash to the gate while wrangling toddlers. As a safety measure, bring car seats for your children. Although airlines still allow children under 2 to travel in your lap, the Federal Aviation Administration says that the safest way for kids who weigh less than 40 pounds to travel is in a car seat. (Booster seats, travel vests and belly belts are not FAA-approved.)The key to traveling with children is to condense your luggage and to carry on only a backpack; that way you can push the stroller or walk around the airport with your hands free. And always wear comfortable shoes and clothing because when it comes to air travel, you never know what obstacles you may encounter. A good rule of thumb? Expect the unexpected.