Enlarge Photo

Photo by: Zach Stovall

Blondbeard and I disembark on Tortola to reconnoiter some of the big island’s beach bars. We limit ourselves to one piña colada at each joint – of course, there are six bars and drink shacks on Cane Garden Bay’s iconic crescent of sand alone. Our favorite colada of the trip, though, gets served up at Smuggler’s Cove, a “secret” beach near the western tip of the island that lies at the end of a kidney-punching collection of potholes strung together to impersonate a road. It’s here that we kick off our shoes and step back in time. Smuggler’s Cove is an as-yet blissfully undeveloped beach of perfect sand, with water as clear as white rum and a lively nearshore snorkeling reef. The beach bars here are primordial, consisting of battered coolers, rustic barbecues and card tables shaded by nothing but coconut palms. So how do you get a properly blended piña colada when you’re totally off the grid? Our vendor of choice operates her blender via a series of car batteries wired together with a nest of cables. Where there’s a will … voilà.

Final Captain's Log: Ship-Faced...

Go back...